As David Cameron arose and started shouting about Northern Rock, the PM flashed another inappropriate smile. Oh, how he must yearn for his first-class cabin at times like this: his capsule bed, his little pyjama outfit, his fluffy socks and his light reading ( War and Peace in the original Russian).
With reluctance, he dragged himself back to PMQs and the wild-eyed man opposite demanding to know how much taxpayers’ money had been invested in Northern Rock. “If the bonds aren’t paid back and if Northern Rock fails to meet its obligations, what is the total exposure? How much?” demanded Mr Cameron.
The PM wouldn’t say. “It is our intention to get the taxpayer the best deal, their money back and to make a profit!”
Well, snapped David Cameron, the real answer was £55 billion and he accused the PM of acting like Del Boy.
The PM was pained. Del Boy? What was that? A horse? A pineapple? Was it related to kebabs? The world must be very confusing at times for our Prime Minister. Mr Cameron shouted: “This is a sub-prime deal from a sub-prime minister!”
This economic taunt hurt, not least because Mr Brown understood it, and the slug-fest began in earnest, a sort of Rocky VI in suits though, actually, I guess that would be Northern Rocky VI. The PM kept saying that the economy was stable, Mr Cameron the opposite. “Isn’t this Northern Rock deal just damaging, dodgy extra debt from a failed Prime Minister?” he screamed.
On Saturday, the Newcastle Journal, reporting on the House of Commons Treasury Committee's report, The run on the Rock, quoted NRSSG founder Robin Ashby:
Last night Robin Ashby, of the Northern Rock Small Shareholders Group, said: “I welcome this report by the Court of Parliament. It brings rapidly to the attention of the authorities their own ‘Contributory Negligence’ in the collapse of Northern Rock and is justification, if any further were needed, in the continuing role of the Government and taxpayer in ensuring that the bank is able to restructure itself and go forward.
On Sunday, writing in the Observer, Catherine Bennett asked (of Richard Branson), 'Why is anyone fooled by the smile of this slick operator?' She concludes:
Branson's Screw It, Let's Do It philosophy may be more persuasive than it looks. Once Rophynol has been ruled out, and, given Mrs Brown's presence, undressed girls ('I believe in using sex appeal to promote the Virgin image'), we may have to accept that nothing more than crass self-promotion has convinced Brown, one of the most sanctimonious leaders in political history, that an act of collective altruism in favour of Branson and his financiers would be fairer, and more popular with taxpayers, than nationalisation. Unless he's just keen on space. A lot of boys are.
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